Sunday, January 8, 2012

To my surprise...over $1000 monthly average spent at retail stores...

To my surprise...over $1000 monthly average spent at retail stores...
So when friends and family (my coveted *fans*) ask me why I'm spending 2012 shopping free, I can add another reason to my list. That's a lot of dollars spent to eventually put clothes in the "Not So Much Anymore" drawer and to over stuff my already too full closet.
Reasons for my resolution: 
No more room 
I have multiples of many things 
I have an embarrassing amount of sprinkles and cookie/baking decorations
 Over 100 pairs of shoes 
more socks than anyone would ever need 
enough tights/nylons to wrap around the state of Washington 
Panties/lingere that would clothe an entire sorority for a year  
25+ hair products 
over 100 nail polish colors 
15 HUSKY sweatshirts 
I'm a habitual impulse buyer 
I could shoot an entire Victoria's Secret Swim Suit shoot with my bathing suit collection
I waste HOURS a day online shopping finding a good deal
I LOVE challenges!
I will avoid the awkward explanations of why I NEEDED something new
Organization will be easier
And now with my online banking tools I can visually see how much money I've saved month over month from 2011 to 2012!

How did this all begin? Who's heard of "Hood Rich?" Urban Dictionary defines it as: "a person with extravagant luxuries that they clearly cannot afford and they live in the hood or have a hood lifestyle." Well, this isn't me, but the excitement of new things for me can be described similarly.  Growing up, we didn't have new fancy things, and for the most part, I didn't notice.  You'll find basketball pictures from the 4th grade in which I'm wearing Holly's hand-me-down shoes with Hawaiian print boys swim trunks.  I remember this one fully tan outfit that I had and LOVED and saved for a special occasion: 5th Grade Picture Day!  This was seriously tan pants with elastic waistband, long sleeve tan top with green flowers or something, and a tan headband. It was perfect and I loved it! A girl named Allison (Last name un-remembered, but she was beautiful and had dark hair and later in life found fascination with bright pink lipstick which I found comical!) didn't like my outfit as much as me and she asked me what I was wearing to which I replied:
"It's picture day! This is my favorite outfit." -Lindsay
"But it's all one color. You look funny." -Allison wheels started turning....
"My mom would NEVER let me wear that!" -Allison
...a big mischievous smile from Lindsay...
"Whatever, I like it!" And I proceeded on with my day fully smiling, un-abolished by her medial remarks as I must have subconsciously known that one day she'd return the favor by wearing pink lipstick for a whole Jr. High Year. 

So on with the story of my over-consumerism ways.  I never knew about fashion, or cared what I looked like or even if my clothes didn't fit.  All I cared about was making people laugh, disrupting class out of boredom, and playing tether ball or swinging on the monkey bars.  I borrowed clothes, got more than enough hand me downs, even tried out some Jean-Co baggy jeans. (a year too late, of course!) 
I remember my dad mailing us a box of goods and I pulled out a pair of tennis shoes and exclaimed: 
"What's addy-dad's?" I didn't get an answer and I didn't care, because they were so cloud-coushiny soft that I didn't take them off for 3 years, even after they no longer fit from my growth spurt! To this day, my favorite running shoes are still Adidas! :) 
I don't know when it all changed and I started caring, but my best guess is when boys started liking the girls with make-up on and not the girl that beat them in races or wall-ball. 

--> Insert quick story here: It's the 4th grade, my first year at Lewis & Clark Elementary and my presence was graciously welcomed by all, except for Holly.  She was mad because Shawn Bird kissed me on the cheek for winning at POGS or something equally as embarrassing. She had a crush on him for much longer than I'd been a Lewis & Clark Explorer. (to the tune of the mickey mouse club: "*Who mapped the way across the west and helped the pioneers? L-E-W-I-S, C-L-A-R-K.  Lewis and Clark: EXPLORERS, Lewis and Clark: EXPLORERS! Forever let us blah blah blah...*" )  She proceeded to hate me for many years, until she finally gave up and decided that I was cool and probably mostly because I laughed at her jokes. <--

Anyway, now that my athletic ability or slap stick humor was no longer gaining the attention of boys, I needed something else.  Eh, who am I kidding?  I didn't hit puberty until the middle of highschool which also meant I had no fun bags! *wah wah* Regardless of the reason, As soon as I started making my own money (from babysitting, mowing lawns, and finally when I was 14 getting my first 'real' job) I made every effort to stretch my dollars as far as I possibly could.  You should've seen what $100 got me in school clothes!  I was on FIRE! Almost as good as those Extreme Coupon-ers! Back then, I would wait as long as possible to wear something new.  It'd hang in my downstairs bedroom closet with tags still on as long as I could hold out. 
MP(Memory Palace): I'm seeing the "Lindsay Pisses in Buckets" welcome sign tattooed on my door by my lovely sister Ashley.  That made me smile right now!  Now I wear them as soon as I get them, that is, of course, as quickly as I can being that a typical shopping spree takes me at least a week to work through. 

I could probably tell childhood stories for years, and I just may, but my fingers are tired and I'm ready for some snuggle time.  Besides, I don't have the patience to describe the following quite yet: 

This morning, as I'm typing, Trevor shouting down the stairs asks: "What's this giant box from New York & Company?"
"...was this another binge from December 28th?"  
...face turning red...
"You tried to conceal."  
... mischievous smile...
"You've gotta hide the evidence Linds..."


  1. Out of your whole list, I was most jealous of your nail polish. I'm thinking I should go to the grocery store and buy a new color.

    I thought I won my husband with my killer jump shot at our college pool. Turns out all he remembers is the design of my killer swimsuit. Boys.

  2. Haha, I have every color imaginable. I rarely use them I don't know why I have them all...

    And boys are funny. I think I won Trevor over with my wall sits and hand slap game endurance! And my ability to be embarrassingly goofy without caring what others think! It could've been my red headband though...

  3. Totally thought of you this morning. I put on that black coat I just bought for like the sixth time this week and panicked. I thought to myself, "I must buy a duplicate in case I wear this one out!"....good to remember that it's not the ONLY black coat that will ever fit me or ever be available. Silly duplicate purchasing. Your blog has affected me in at least one action already!

  4. Bre, You are notorious for duplicate purchasing! Your black coat will suffice for this season, and if you need something new later on (which you wont) then you can buy it at that time! :)
    Love ya!

  5. You could always add another to your list of reasons: 10% of my monthly saves will go to help the charity called my sister who is in dyer need of a clothing makeover! (And I'm talking about me here.)


  6. Lindsay, I am seriously LOVING your blog! Keep it up girl, so proud of you! You are a great writer, and so funny! I'm very impressed!